Truth, Perspectives and Peace

I get a lot of my inspiration for posts from sermons at church.  We have two great preachers who I feel are open to God's leading and even if it isn't apparent or relevant to their topic, something they say usually spurs a blogpost.  So if you're ever interested in listening to some great ones, you can listen here.

There is truth in matters and then there are perspectives.  The truth is the 9/11 wasn't a government conspiracy, the holocaust did happen, and men have walked on the moon.  The truth is the Jesus did die on the cross for us and rise again.

Last summer I had a conflict with someone I worked with.  We were both transitioning...she into a job at our office and I to part time.  We both had a way we saw this would happen, but it wasn't necessarily how the other saw it as happening.  I had created most of the processes for doing everything on the business side of things and I felt a lot of ownership over the business.  To say it was a difficult transition for me to let go of some things is putting it mild.  And with me not being in the office, things just had to be done whether they were the right way or not.  Now I know I sound really controlling and I am in some aspects, but some crucial mistakes were made because of this.  We deal with very sensitive information and fragile people.  Now this is my perspective, her's maybe different. Well, we both thought the other was being ridiculous for being upset. However we both needed each other to be there in the capacity that we were for different reasons.  It took a little while to feel good and at peace with the other person, but we were both determined to make peace because working in an office together as we do mandates it. 

Chad and I in our marriage are the same way in that we feel it is essential to make peace even when we disagree.  Making peace may not happen as quickly as we would like, but most of the time it means having hard discussions and working through things together whether we are actually feeling it or not.  Sometimes it's acting like it's peaceful even when we don't feel it and the feelings catch up.

In John 9 there is a story of a man who was blind from birth and Jesus healed.  The Pharisees were in such disbelief they accused the man of faking his entire life for not being the same person who was blind. They even questioned the man's parents.  I wonder how blinded I may be at times.  I often thought that if Jesus came today I would be a Pharisee and not see Jesus for who he is.  I hope not, especially with the miracles so apparent that he performed. 

At what cost do we make peace with people?  Is our perspective worth being crucified over?  Jesus was crucified for us and I don't think that anything that I encounter would come close to being crucified over. I think it would be the same for most Christians in the USA, but I think sometimes we choose our will over peace because we lose sight that it is our perspective we see and not necessarily the truth. 

So on this Good Friday, I'm going to make a resolution to appreciate the cross more and work to achieve peace at almost any cost.  Conflict, drama, etc is just not worth it.

Ever changing...

As much as I hate change, I hope that I never stop changing ever more.  I feel if I'm not changing in actions, then it proves inwardly I'm not changing and thus not being open to God's voice in my life.  I think at times its cliche to say oh that's God's voice, but I do believe that you can hear God's direction for your life and follow it.  I just know that although I never seem to anticipate what God's going to be doing prior to, its always nice to see the outcome of what he's done.

It was around this time last year that I took a step back at work, pursued some other things, but after this year it is time for me to take a step forward at work and while I'll still be part time it will be halfway between where I am now and full time.  With Steven being older we think it is a good move because of how social he is and loves to be with others.  I've found a renewed sense of satisfaction in my work and have worked through difficult situations which have made me stronger.  I'm excited for the change even if it means other harder decisions have had to be made.  I don't like the change, but I do like what the other side of change looks like on me. 

Caterpillar hunting

Steven went caterpillar hunting this afternoon.  We found an area with more than 15 caterpillars and he had a ball.....

Ms. Suzie Homemaker

I used to imagine my life as an adult being a stay at home wife and mother, which would entail sewing, baking homemade bread, crafting, etc, etc.  My life looks quite different these days, but this weekend I managed to get a batch of bread done.  I was telling a friend and she stared in disbelief.....

I actually milled the wheat? Yep, that's me!

But I don't break a sweat doing it :)

The recipe is quite well-worn

I have this great mixer that makes it SO easy!

Steven got into the action and took time for a quick cheesy smile

Instead of large loaves, I tried a smaller sandwhich type roll, which didn't come out exactly the shape I wanted, but oh so good!

There is no condemnation.....

Recently I heard a sermon on Romans 8, therefore there is no condemnation ......I think I fall short many times not really living out sharing the no condemnation.  I don't like to think that someone, for the most part, would be condemned, but I'm not sure that I live my life thinking that if I don't share Jesus that person may be condemned. 

On this particular Sunday, I was coming into the service late having led worship for the preschoolers. In the hallway I spoke with two individuals who were talking about a young boy who had "caused a stir" in the service.  He was walking around the sanctuary during worship and finally someone took him to talk with him.  He had said it was his birthday and his friend at church told him he would give him $5.  I knew exactly who the kid was.  It was Shemar.  Shemar has shown up at church a few times the first being Christmas Eve.  I've seen him on a couple of occasions.  He walks from his apartment a few miles away.  He's in his early teens, not well dressed and I think would be classified as "special education."  When he came back in he sat up front with a direct view of the minister.  The sermon was Romans 8....don't wait to show no condemnation to others.  After the service as I was getting into my car here comes the minister with his two daughters and Shemar.  He was giving Shemar a ride home.  And I think in that moment Shemar was shown what not being condemned would maybe feel like.  Now I may be romanticising this a bit, but I hope and pray that he at least feels that our church is a place where he can experience Jesus' love. 

I keep thinking what's a way I can show no condemnation to someone who crosses my path.  I'm not sure what the answer is and then I get really busy with life and forget to even think about it.  I think the business is the problem for me.  Why do I not stop to actually think through the eternal matters? Why do I get more caught up with getting through the day to day? Where we're going to move? What and if a children's ministry job will come my way? And I think that's the problem. I get too focused on the earthly things and anything can no matter how Christian it may be.  However I hope that nothing eternal will become earthly. I hope that the bigger kingdom perspective will matter.  Sometimes I'm not too sure how that will look, but I'm hoping I can figure it out a little bit.

Having Babies, Part 2

Back in August I blogged about why we have babies. I may have discovered the answer...at least for us. This past Friday we took Steven to Chad's co-worker's "farm."

Steven having a conversation with the dog about getting on the horse before he would get on the horse.

Chad riding a horse for the first time

Talking to the donkey

And I am getting somewhere with this...

Steven running down the hill from the donkeys to tell Joe.  He ran saying "Joe! Joe!"

And then it was somewhere along here that Chad was expressing to Joe how grateful we were that he allowed Steven to come and see the animals. And Joe's response answered my question to why we have babies. He said that he enjoyed Steven coming more than Steven enjoyed it.  That's it!  Steven brings joy to the world.  I think he is a testimony to God's love and sharing Jesus to others even in his own way.  He makes me realize more and more how much we should strive to be like Jesus.  He doesn't think twice about asking to sing Jesus Loves Me in the middle of the store or ask to pray before we eat wherever we are.  He shows a level of living life to the fullest that sometimes I forget and I know the story of our Saviour.  So in a nutshell, I believe we should having children because they share Christ with others like we cannot.  Now I'm not saying Joe doesn't know Jesus because I think he does. I'm not saying Steven could share the gospel in its entirety, but who can?  He does share Jesus' love with anyone and everyone whether they choose to listen or not in his own unique way.  He brings joy like no other can and hopefully one day we will have more children that can share Jesus' love like he does. 

And to share a little more of his joy, here's so more pictures and a few videos from our visit to the farm....

Towards the end he got a little brave

And rode the horse by himself

But not for too long

And to this movie Steven said "Steven's a mess".....

Goodbye Lil' Stout

Yesterday I saw that a friend was going to have to put their dog down because of kidney failure.  I emailed her that I could not imagine what she was going through and little did I know about 12 hours later we would be doing the same thing.  We have had two wonderful dogs; first came Gustav, our beloved German Shepherd in 2004 and in 2006 we decided that he needed a playmate and a playmate is what he got.  We "rescued" a spaniel/lab mixed puppy.  We name him Guinness Stout, called him Stout, because he looked so dark brown that at times it appeared black and had a nice white "foamy" patch on his neck. 

He's been the happiest dog I think I've ever encountered and he brought so much joy to our lives. Some of our greatest memories I think will be recent as Steven had grown so fond of Stout.  One of Steven's favorite things to do was to chase Stout around the house with a duck puppet saying "quack, quack." 

This morning around 3:30 we heard him distressed, so I got up to see what was the matter.  After a few minutes I realized he couldn't get up and was paralyzed in his hind quarters.  Chad and I spent the next several hours comforting our sweet Stout knowing what was probably to come.  He was so loving and just wanted us there with him.  When Steven woke up and we told him Stout was hurt he said, "oh no, Stout hurt, give him some chocolate milk!"  He was so sweet in petting him and knew it wasn't the time to try and chase Stout.  He even brought pieces of food over to Stout and said "here you go, thank you, you're welcome" as if he was carrying on a full conversation with Stout.  After many tears, Chad took him to the vet and they confirmed that even if we spent thousands of dollars there was no guarantee of any improvement. 

The house is very somber without our precious Stout and it'll be a while before Steven quits calling him to come and "get yours Stout" when its feeding time; or telling him to get out of the living room; and every time he does it breaks my heart because Stout isn't in there to be told to get out.